The Following jokes are from the 2004 Page-A-Day 365 Stupidest Things Ever Said Calendar. I wrote the publishers for permission to post these, and after about 8 months, long after I had began posting them, I received official permission. So here they are:

(I am in the process of adding forward and back links in the jokes. About half are done, and I'm saving the rest untill I add more jokes that will go in the middle.)

As you may have noticed, the first few months of the year are over-represented. That will change, but not until I get going on adding more-- the stack of good jokes is now over an inch thick. I put up a few of the best ones, and now I'm going back and reading each one from day one. Enjoy!

A selection from the 2004 "365 Stupidest Things Ever Said" calendar:

January February
On the Future, Where to Find
On Perhaps Some Lipo Is in Order...
Great Moments in Speechmaking
On Autobiographies, Defining Problems
On Books That Will Never Make The Times Best-Seller List
On Grounds for Divorce, All Too Common
On Zoo Questions
On Thanks For the Helpful Information
On Living Up to the Letter of the Law
On Congressional Wisdom
On Me, Myself, and Me
On Families We Wouldn't Want to Be Part Of
On Jupiter, Venus, Snickers, Neptune, and Apollo
On That Clears Things Up
On Damning with Faint Praise
On Metaphors, Confusing
On Those Jaywalking Fish
On Time, Relative
On Fresh Air, Maybe a Little Too Fresh
On Speeches, Not So Rousing
On Extra Sensory Perception Network
On Food, Deep Thoughts About
"Can't Argue With That" Department
On Books That Will Never Make the Times Best-Sellers List
On Truisms
On Basketball Players, Webbed
On Speculation, Clearing It Up
On Say That Again, Mom
On Food, Virtual
"Can't Argue With That" Department
On Calendars, Not Too Useful
On Signs, Challenging
On le Jazz, Hot
On Insults
On Insightful Explanations of What "Fastest" Means
On Freudian Slips
On Figuring Out Leap Years, Helpful Government Hints For
MarchApril
On What Not to Say to Steven Spielberg
On Natural-Born Talent, When You Get It
On Four Fords
On Strange Studies
On Openness, Covert
On Newspaper Mistakes, So Easy to Make
On That Wacky Polysyllabic Defense Department
On Cliches, Odd
Stupid Movie Quotes Department
On Murder, Pithy Mayoral Thoughts About
On Advice, Good
On Problems, Problematic
On Why You Need Elastic-Waist Pants When You Go to Rotterdam
What Not to Put in an American Embassy Press Release in Ireland
On Musclebrains, Distinctions Between
On Those Good Old Days
On Vice Presidents, A Little Over the Top
On Drivers, Dumb
On Metaphors, Mangled
On Where the Action Is
On Honey, Not Tonight--I Forgot to Eat the Pizza
On Insightful Comments About Antidrug Spokesmen Caught with 53 Pounds of Marijuana
On If You Say So...
On What Was It Like Before?
On Maybe I Should Just Buy a Different Watch
On Now We Get It...
On TV Executive Boasts, Somewhat Different
On No Wonder It's So Cheap
Great Moments in Game Shows
On So That's Why She's Advertising
On We Hope You Do
On Gotta Love That IRS
On Existential Restaurant Dialogues
Great Moments in Game Shows
On Main Groups, Ubiquitous
On Those Marvelous Infallible Computers
On Patients, Savvy
Great Moments in Tech Support
On Department Store Ads That Are a Drag
On So That's Where My Underwear's Been Going...
MayJune
On Commies, Quiet
On Those Unanswerable Questions
On Yeah, What Does That tell You?
On Strange Wishes
On Golf Wisdom
 In progress
JulyAug
In progress
SeptemberOctober
Great Moments in Legal Testimony
On Sportscasters, Keeping Their Eyes on the Ball
On Hikers' Observations to the Forest Service, Stupid
NovemberDecember
On Testimonials, Not So Stirring
On Thanks for the Explanation
On Fast as Molasses?
On Directions, Real Helpful
"Can't Argue with That" Department
On Distractions, Distractions
On Praise, Hollywood Style
On "Signs"
On Space Station Mir Problems with Fire, Computer Failure, Oxygen System Breakdown, Power Failures, Overheating, Disconnected Power Cables, Collisions, Etc.
On Fascinating Sports Insights
 In progress

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